Gioria Bomfim: Hard Mode

The Parody of Sesame Street: Hard Mode and Sesame Street: Unimaginably Hard Mode.

Do you like Devinantart user named Gioria Bomfim?

Answer me honestly.

I see your college-age asses watching  Gioria Bomfim in your dorm and reading about devinantart on the fucking youtube

And that's ok. Because she was keep fucking plagiarized the stories and she fucking sucks and keep taking a requests.

The shit I sprayed in horror all over my walls, my carpet, my keys, my clothes, and my $600 laptop after discovering that no, it wasn't some cocaine-addled nightmare, there really is a fucking advanced Devinantart older people.

I first heard about it while lurking on hate art of Gioria Bomfim some guys were making a hate art of werewolf joey and that was making me laugh my ass off.

And that's when I saw it.

A strange notifications was sitting in my devinantart account. The user named Werewolf Joey, the profile shows a werewolf joey with very cute eyes.

Probably just an alternate account from Gioria Bomfim about some stupid product making a art that I had no interest in.

But when I opened the notifications, I knew this wasn't an ordinary message.

The message said "Woof! Woof! It's me! Werewolf Joey! Go on gamejolt!"

Attached to the link was a single file.

"GioriaHM.oggy."

Oh, shit.

The fuck was a .OGGY file?

Dear mo-fuckin Reader, I could've just clicked away. I could've deleted that email and ignored the fact that I had ever learned of the existence of a first Hard Mode game.

But if I did, I'd be stuck in the shadow of Hard Mode forever.

The only way to truly get better, to really recover, was to confront Gioria Bomfim: Hard Mode one last time, and end this once and for all.

I clicked the file.

My computer, having never seen a .oggy file before (I mean, fuck, has anyone?) asked me what program I wanted open the file with. The computer suddenly detected a program I'd never installed before called "GioriaGames" with an icon of Thaddeus Blie with a angry face.

I knew that Gioria Games was the only program that could actually open the file. I don't know how it installed itself on my computer, but for now, I played along.

Immediately, the game came to life.

The Gioria Bomfim Games logo appeared with a shitty corporate A font, but it was accompanied by the sound of someone shitting. I'm pretty sure it was Withered Freddy. It sounded like Withered Freddy, specifically, taking a fucking shit and moaning as fnaf Beatbox plays in the background.

Damn, So Gioria is a big fan of FNAF?

And also I heard Scott Cawthon make a new game called "FNAF: Security Breach" but it's more like "FNAF: Shitting Toilet" if you ask me.

Then, Thaddeus Bile. He was eating the child, and it appeared to be pretty basic arithmetic. The shitty Monster Inc Creepypasta, stuff like that.

There were thaddeus bile's kids sitting on the floor around him.

"Hello there! It's me Thaddeus-O blie!" Thaddeus as he stared into the screen.

"Come join us in our game of mathematics!"

But the weird thing is, lip sync was SHIT.

It's look like Gioria Bomfim bad at animation and even lip sync.

Thaddeus Bile picked up a chalkboard went from his kid to kid asking if they could solve the problems he wrote on the board. They were generally very easy and the kids figured them out without issue.

Before I had time to even answer that, DeeDee from Oggy and the Cockroaches fucking burst onto the Nick Room in front of a wall, but he had fucking changed his name to "COCKCOCK". I knew this because he was wearing a name tag that said "HELLO, MY NAME IS" with "COCKCOCK" shittily markered on.

DeeDee (or was it CockCock now?) started singing in a deep, gruff, unintelligible voice. It sounded like he was singing in some fucking made-up bullshit language.

"WHAT THE FUCK ORANGE THING?" Thaddeus Bile said as he picked up his chainsaw from monster Inc deleted fucking version.

Dee Dee (Cock Cock who the fuck) dodge from the chainsaw.

As he whipped out a gun to shoot thaddeus bile before he shoot him. Suddenly, a prompt appeared on my computer screen.

"What is he saying? and save thaddeus bile!" it read, along with a box for me to type the answer in below.

I honestly couldn't fuckin' tell. The audio seemed to distort more and more as I listened to it. At one point it literally sounded like a fucking violin coming out of a human's mouth. What little text I could make out were all in Mandarin Chinese and translated to extremely crude phrases like "Say goodbye to cock cock-boy!" and "The C-man is back!".

I tried to type as much of it as I could make out into the box and nervously pressed enter.

Suddenly, Dee Dee/Cock Cock/whatever stopped singing and stared into the screen. I have never seen a fucking cockroach express such rage before.

"YOUR TOO LATE! YOUR TOO FUCKING LATE! YOU FUCKIN' DUMB! YOU SO FUCKIN' STUPID! YOU WRONG ASS! NO DINNER FOR YOU!"

Dee Dee shot thaddeus bile as blood splattering fucking EVERYWHERE.

The kids fucking screamed in horror.

Sunddenly a BUNCH of fucking lots flashing colors appear in the screen.

I nearly expected the fuckin' thing I got epilepsy.

Why did I still got seizure? All of this was taking place on the other side of my computer screen, and yet every time I participated in Gioria Bomfim: Hard Mode I legitimately felt as if my life was in some kind of danger. Why did I feel like these characters (even OATC Oc Charaters) and monster inc characters could actually harm me?

Probably because my fucking PC exploded after Hard Mode #1, but I've tried to convince myself that never happened after a couple years of therapy.

We see Marky.

Suddenly, the "U rappin'" meter from that old "Parappa The Rapper" game appeared as Marky picked up a fucking Mic and started dropping bars.

My computer Mic clicked on as Marky demanded I rap along.

The lyrics were obscene, riddled with references to drugs and swearing and even sex jokes. If I refused to rap, however, the "U rappin'" meter would began to fall and Marky would lose his SHIT.

What was with the fucking death threats in this? It was Xliam!

I finished the rap and Marky threw his Mic at a fucking wall.

The next scene was.....bizarre. There was no prompt, no question, nothing. It was just a scene of Whoops The Cockroach in a broken-ass home sitting on a fuckin' couch watching Disney fuckin' Channel Gravity Mo-Fucking Falls on TV.

Suddenly, the TV lost power and fuckin' crapped out right in the middle of the show.

Whoops let out a deep sigh.

"What the fuck?" She whispered almost inaudibly as she slowly crept over to the TV.

Whoops then proceeded to fuckin' SMACK the side of the TV with all her might. She started hitting it so FUCKING hard that bits and pieces of the fuckin' ceiling started raining down on her head.

Whoops then accidentally struck a little too hard, SMASHED through the fuckin' side of the TV, and screamed "WHOOPS-GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!"

(W.I.P) [[Category:Ü]]